What happens when I go to Poland?

What happens when I go to Poland? I turn into a zombie! :D

I'm such a nice zombie!

Okay, I'm just kidding. But sometimes doing stupid things is the best way of coping with difficult emotions. This wonderful photo was taken yesterday by my mum after we bought those funny teeth candies. ;) It took me quite a long time to decide, whether I should go to Poland or not (or, to be more precise, should I go just to the Katowice airport when the time of my flight comes, or whether I should go a bit earlier and visit my relatives) and I made the decision in the last minute, which is typical for me. I decided to go just in order not to regret not going later. I realise it's probably not the best motivation - ideally I should just feel like coming here, just like most of my groupmates, who have come to Lviv to study, feel happy whenever they can go to their hometown. A few years ago I'd still feel guilty because of not having such feelings, but things just are the way they are and I have to accept it. I don't ever go to my hometown (Wrocław) anymore, unless it's because of some paperwork, because I don't have any relatives living there anymore. Therefore I usually come to Opole, which is the hometown of my mum and where she's been living with my grandfather lately. It's been difficult. We've had some really emotional conversations, which weren't easy for any of us, but perhaps we needed them. I don't know, whether that's going to change anything or not, but it's good to know that at least we're able to discuss certain issues. I must admit that my mum has been trying to be nice for me. Maybe it's just me, who's not appreciating it as much as I should?

A book, paper and envelopes from my Mum.

She knows how much I'm into penpalling, so she's bought me 250 colourful sheets and 200 envelopes, as well as a book of a Polish writer, who's very much into East Europe and Central Asia and who has signed this book for me. I'm really thankful, although at the same time I get distressed, as fitting it all into my small WizzAir luggage (this airline only lets you take a small backpack on board for free) is a bit of a challenge. And I wouldn't like to hurt her by leaving anything here. Our relationship is very complicated, but sometimes I think that one of the main problems is basically a very simple one: we have completely different ways of expressing our feelings and, as a result, we both feel there's something missing. 

Another reason why I felt quite nervous about coming to Poland is that yesterday there was a court trial for official separation between my grandparents. They've been living separately for almost 2 years, but the thing is that somehow my grandfather didn't receive a letter from court (I don't know how it's possible) and I was supposed not to tell him anything... And I hate lying, I can't really do that. Yesterday I've met my grandmother only for 15 minutes in the court, she looked quite overwhelmed by the whole situation, but I really hope we're going to spend some more time together today. I'll take a train to Kluczbork, the town where she lives with my grandaunt, in a couple of hours.

For Stav in Israel.

On a more positive note, I've been taking a lot of effort to catch up with my huge pile of mail. :) I've written a long letter for my dear Stav in Israel partly in Ukraine, but mostly on a Polish train from Przemyśl to Opole. That was a very effective Training session! ;)

For Mihaela in Romania

In Opole I've started using the envelopes that I have from my mum and I've decided to answer my new penpals first, because I believe new friendships require regularity to develop. This envelope went to Mihaela from Romania, who's totally new to penpalling, but has written me a really lovely letter. :)

For Taši in Slovenia

This letter went to Taši in Slovenia and I hope it'll reach her before her birthday! :) In case you've been wondering why I'm posting the pictures of my letters without stamps now, I'll explain you: once I give my letters to the lady at the post office in Poland, I never get to see them again! ;) And I don't have any Polish stamps with me.

For Jennifer in UK

Finally, I've answered Jennifer's (who's also known as Hunter) great intro letter and this envelope will start traveling today. I still have 8 letters left to answer, but I believe I'll manage not to delay my answers too much, because I've been in a very productive writing mood, as you can see above. :)

Tomorrow I'll start a great journey again and I'll be even more of a zombie, because I'll have to spend the night on a train, bus and then the Katowice airport, so I won't really get to sleep anywhere. But I'm really excited about the adventure, which is about to begin! Hopefully I'll survive both the flight and my aviaphobia (I'm not sure which one of them is actually more dangerous) and will be able to share my experiences with you! ;)